A Da Crow Production
Dear Guys Working on the MRR2...
How's it going? I only ask because you started work over three years ago to add more lanes and, well... there aren't any. I've also noticed that on most days you're not actually doing anything. Is it possible you've grown bored with the project? I certainly would understand that. I've got more than a few half- finished reports sitting on my desk. Of course, when I blow off my job millions of commuters aren't, how shall we say... fornicated.
I just want you to know that I'm rooting for you to complete your Herculean task and cut the ribbon on what will undoubtedly be a meaningless effort to ease traffic. I'd also like to offer up a few suggestions. From my untrained eye, you appear to be understaffed. Perhaps you might consider hiring a few thousand more guys and work in 'round the clock shifts, instead of, you know, just when you feel like it. Also, to avoid angry commuters flipping you off, how about giving them a heads up when you close an off lanes for no apparent reason? (Maybe a few miles in advance instead of a hundred yards.) And finally, I need to ask a small favour.
Several times a week I crawl along MRR2 with a bladder that is near to bursting. How about we work out a system where I, and other urinary-challenged drivers, get to pull over and share your mobile toilet. Maybe we can repay your hospitality by bringing you fresh magazines to read while you're in there pretending to working.
Sincerely,
A caring commuter
